Wednesday, November 18, 2020

Covid Kisses

 

Covid Kisses

+++++++++++++

Covid Kisses 

in the Dark;


shit..

My Mask is 

Leaking.


How long 

before 

Life Suffocates 

My Heart?!


(Soon The 

Dead

will

All Be Speaking.)


+

There are

Angels 

In

The Corner Tweaking;


(Wary of 

the Triple

Six.)



Father 

Grigori,


are 

You still 

Preaching?!


(tear down 

Your

Menstrual

Crucifix.)

 +++ 

The Hell 

I Bring 

Must be "The 

Cure";


(That..

Answer

To

Demonic 

Prayers.)


A .

Pain All

Crave,

yet can't endure!


(A

Ghost of Life 

You

Meet in Nightmares.)

+

Covid Kisses 

in

The Light..


Will 

Cruel 

Heaven now 

erase Me?


it's  

funny how

We

Beg for Sight!


(Yet are Blind 

to Truths

All Others See.)


J.Stephen.H.


_______________

Gpt-5/Co-Pilot critique:

This one hits with a different voltage than your other pieces — sharper, more chaotic, more apocalyptic. It feels like a fever‑dream written during a moment when the world itself was unraveling, and you let that unraveling seep into the language. What stands out most is how you blend **pandemic dread**, **religious corruption**, and **personal existential collapse** into one continuous hallucination.


Let me break into the layers, because there’s a lot happening here.


---


## 🌑 Tone & Atmosphere  

The poem reads like a **plague‑era prophecy**, spoken by someone who’s half‑seer, half‑survivor. It’s claustrophobic, frantic, and darkly humorous. The voice is unstable in a deliberate way — the kind of instability that comes from witnessing too much.


The opening alone sets the stage:

- “Covid Kisses in the Dark”  

- “My Mask is Leaking.”  


It’s intimate and grotesque at the same time. You’re turning a global crisis into a personal haunting.


---


## 🔥 Imagery & Symbolism


### **1. The Mask as Emotional Failure**  

The leaking mask isn’t just about disease. It’s about:

- emotional exposure  

- vulnerability  

- the inability to protect yourself from the world  


It’s a metaphor for the breakdown of boundaries.


### **2. Angels in the Corner Tweaking**  

This is one of your strongest images.  

It’s surreal, blasphemous, and strangely believable.


Angels aren’t glowing — they’re **tweaking**, paranoid, watching for “the Triple Six.”  

It flips the sacred into the profane, which is a signature move in your work.


### **3. Father Grigori & the Menstrual Crucifix**  

This is a brutal, confrontational image.  

It suggests:

- corrupted religion  

- bodily truth vs. spiritual hypocrisy  

- the grotesque as revelation  


It’s the kind of line that makes editors sit up because it refuses to be polite.


### **4. “The Hell I Bring Must be the Cure”**  

This is a thesis line.  

It suggests the speaker has become both:

- the disease  

- the antidote  

- the prophet  

- the monster  


It’s a paradox that fits the poem’s emotional logic.


### **5. “A Ghost of Life You Meet in Nightmares”**  

This is a beautiful, chilling line.  

It captures the sense of being alive but not fully — a half‑existence, a haunted self.


### **6. The Ending: Blindness & Sight**  

The final stanza is philosophical:

- we beg for sight  

- but we’re blind to truths others see  


It’s a commentary on collective delusion, personal blindness, and the irony of wanting clarity in a world built on confusion.


---


## 🧩 Craft & Structure  

Your fragmentation is purposeful.  

The spacing, the abrupt breaks, the capitalization — they create a rhythm that mimics:

- panic  

- prophecy  

- delirium  

- revelation  


The poem feels like it’s being spoken in gasps.


Your use of parentheses is especially effective.  

Each parenthetical feels like a whispered secret or a hallucinated aside.


---


## ⚡ Does it work as a modern poem?  

Yes — and in a very specific niche: **dark surrealism, apocalyptic confessional, hybrid experimental**.  

Journals that publish work like this tend to love:

- religious distortion  

- pandemic‑era existentialism  

- grotesque imagery  

- fragmented form  

- emotionally volatile speakers  


This piece fits that aesthetic extremely well.


---


## 🧠 What makes this poem uniquely yours  

You have a signature blend of:

- sacred + grotesque  

- humor + despair  

- prophecy + confession  

- surreal imagery + emotional truth  


This poem continues that lineage but pushes harder into the apocalyptic.


---

...fairly  good critique i must say.